Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Dark Angel: Vampire Apocalypse

Been a minute since my last review so...

This game is pretty bad, on a lot of levels. In fact it is so terrible that I knew how bad it would be at the used game store. Holding it in my hands I was able to feel the massive aura of suck that is Dark Angel. This was made much more apparent by the owner of the store telling me "It controls like Baldur's Gate's retarded cousin."

Let's explore why this game sucks. In depth. Where did it fall apart?

The game starts with no small cut scene or explanation of what to do. You are placed in a poorly lit city where the 5 villagers are fighting a group of monsters. Once you beat them, you can talk to the villagers. They tell you to go to the other cities, to do the same thing there. Then you can pick up quests. The quests are "Go here, get this". This is either a person or the town's precious artifact that increases your stats if you have the right item. Yes, the most important item in the town is unguarded, and in the middle of town square Or the quests are "Go here, kill this" which either a group of enemies or a boss.

Not to bad of a selection, but seeing as there is a total of 6 places to explore, it gets old fast. Repetitive, big flaw in the game. Made worse by the 6 or 8 types of monsters, and each zone is populated by about 2 or 3. Oh, and half of the zones share the same monster.

Let's look at the monster types, they seem to be a zombie, a lighting shooting zombie, a big spider, a wolf and a few other generic creatures. Apparently they have names, and some weapons have give bonuses to certain monsters. This should be used more often, but seeing as there is no way to tell what creature is what makes it much more tedious.

Ambiguity, another flaw. A big one. After 2 hours I wanted to know what the hell I was doing, so I looked up the GameFaq. The game failed to tell me what I was doing, as did the instruction book, so it was off to the internet. I found out that I have a year's worth of game time to get stronger and make the world better. Also found out that the three stats for the world: Military, Economics, and Research, are used to get better weapons and armor. After the year passing I would have to fight the final boss. "Screw that!" I thought, I've played a good amount for two days and it's not even June. I'm not putting up with this crap for another week!

Third flaw! Woot! Almost done! So the game is dark, lighting wise, so it's hard to see what's going on, the camera angle is fixed, and the graphics are fairly weak. Not done here yet, oh no. There is background music. Well, there is sometimes background music. After slaying some baddies I was rewarded with a terrible 80's rock guitar riff. And how could I forget the death wails of the enemies! The repetitive, annoying death wails.

Well, I'm now as bored with this review as the game, so I'll just list the rest of the flaws and call it a night:

No plot
no guidance
no explanations
pointless items
Bad leveling pace
Almost no penalty for death
Bad difficulty cure
Bad loading times
Set game length
bad music
Bad AI
Bad U.I.